I was just relating that I've had major depressive illness along with my bipolar I have had it for 37 years now. Sometimes good, most times not so much. Right now I have been isolating for over 2 years. I rarely go out, even just outside. I sit in my recliner hunched up just either not thinking at all or ruminating. There is no easy way out. I have several pills, Seroquel, lamotrigine, clonazepam, also low thyroid, diabetes, going blind, several eye operations. I isolate to stop thinking. I even put on tv just so the noise drowns out some of my thoughts.
My family doctor asked me why am I so depressed I have a great husband, and so much going for me. I couldn't answer him. I don't know why.
In 1993 or so I was so bad....my psychiatrist gave me several shock treatments. It began to get me out of the major depression and it worked for awhile, but then I started getting short term memory loss on top of all my other illnessess. I am trying to put myself out, but can't seem to keep to a schedule or a walk. Last walk I took I got lost. My memory. I was going to walk for 15 min and wound up looking around for more than an hour trying to find my way home. It's not a good feeling. I feel lost literally and emotionally. Anyone find a way to take a few steps and be able to focus long enough to make it a habit of putting yourself out? Thank you for listening.