I don't know, maybe I am angry at him, right now just hurt is all I feel. I know he said what he said to get my butt in gear and to stop feeling sorry for myself. I cannot change the situation of my marriage, and he wants me to move forward to protect me and my children. But I guess I needed him more on the do this A first thing.........which is what he told me he isn't going to do, and I know that wanting him to do this is wrong, but for me to all of a sudden make the big decsions is very scary!!!

I guess I never took a step back and realized that I have always been controlled. When he brought this to my attention it hit like a brick. I knew that the abuse I suffered went deep, but didn't realize that my husband is doing the same as my Dad and brother did when it comes to just doing everyday things!!! I just fell from one situation to another and never stopped to see why or how!!

He is right when he said "we have been through alot together", in the disclosing and telling my siblings he was right there step by step, it was in his office, now I am home and even though I can hear his words, it isn't making any of this easy, I have to do it all on my own the first step. Does that make any sense??