Quote:
Originally Posted by lolagrace
My pdoc described my mixed states as an agitated depression. In a mixed state I'm at my most dangerous. I'm suicidal, and because I'm so agitated, I'm also very impulsive and have the energy to carry out plans.
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My pdoc has used the same description for me. I've also heard 'excited depression'. My last mixed episode landed me in IP.
I'm agitated, I'm impulsive, I have energy, but I'm also suicidal and anxious. I have negative thoughts/ideas, but they come at me with this rush. Like racing thoughts that I can't stop, only they are everything depressive I could ever think. And I can't sleep because of them because it is so loud that I feel like I want to just cover my ears and scream. I often describe it as chaos in my head.
It's hell.