Open Eyes, I appreciate your response. Right now, its baby steps. I been praying about it and who would have ever thought she would invite me in her house to talk. I understand whatbflaws I made and I actually had the chance to sincerely apologize to her in person yesterday. I also went to her house today to tuck the kids in for bed, then I apologized for the lack of communication and not being there for her when she needed me. She was on her phone and heard me but didn't say much. After I said that, I told her goodnight and I left. I need to work on my communication and work on my anger. Even though it burns me up inside with the way things have went down, I have to find a way to be more humble cause we all make mistakes. I know I have to be patient because I did break her trust and self esteem. I was a big part and that and I'm doing whatever it takes to make us right again. I just hope she gives me the opportunity again to love her as her husband.