Hello Luna: This appears to be your first post here on PC. So... to PsychCentral… from the Skeezyks! May the time you spend here be of benefit.

Hopefully coming here to PC can be of some comfort & support. However, as I'm sure you realize, there's only so much that can be done on-line. Given that you're feeling as actively suicidal as you are, I'd like to encourage you to reach out in real life for the help you need.

I've been where you are a couple of times. So I know a thing or two about this suicide stuff. I know that when a person becomes suicidal, their focus narrows until they can no longer see other options. I also know how difficult it can be for family members to know what to do.

A suicide creates a shock wave that echoes down through the generations & gives everyone who was close to the person who is gone permission to do the same thing. It's a sad legacy to leave behind. So I pray that you will be able to find the strength to do what has to be done in order to heal.

PsychCentral is a great place to get information as well as support for mental health issues. The more you post, & reply to other members’ posts, the more a part of the community you will become. Plus there are social groups you can join & chat rooms where you’ll be able to connect with other PC members in real time (once your first 5 posts have been reviewed & approved.) Lots of great stuff! So please keep posting!