I struggled with alcohol and drugs for 30 or so years before I received my diagnosis at age 50. I'm not sure about the medical connection, but it is my understanding that BP and alcoholism are often comorbid. My run of foolishness seems to be the reverse of many......I didn't party when I was down, I partied when I was up. Mania seemed to drive me into going completely overboard. I'm convinced of this because there were times when I could take it or leave it. I didn't need booze as a crutch, per se. But when I was up, I could rage with the best of them. My friends would joke that I would "set the pace" at a party. Add in some rock and roll and the night was complete. It was a simple connection - I was in a great mood, ready to conquer anything, and I'd just go bonkers. I could never just have a drink. I had to have 20. I've passed out in the bushes, in my driveway (twice), on the lawn, in my dining room....many times in front of my kids.

I absolutely love being sober. I wouldn't trade it for anything. The last 30 years was a wasted 30 years as far as I'm concerned. I've just begun to live. I can't remember the last hangover I had or the last time I stayed in bed until 2PM. I can't remember the last time I had to work someone for some dope. It was all worthless. All of it.