Rose actually brings up very good points. Sometimes it takes insight from experiences to make me wake up and see the bigger picture.
Crypts, I'm not comfortable with seeing someone respond to another person's response on my thread. you gave good advice from what you read. Thank you, but don't directly approach someone else's response to get a "rise" out of them, or contradict their opinion. Thank you.

Now, as I look at this again, I'm realizing how needy I have become. I did not drop by where he works and he even wonders why I don't sometimes. That is his place of work, I have no business being there.

He is private, but he explained it was a co worker. I am a jealous person and so is he. We both question what we are up to, we live an hour apart. He actually has to hear me repeat myself about the past with men, I guess I try to explain myself so he understands why I am the way I am. I still believe he is controlling, but Rose brings up a very good point. I've been dropping by HIS place more often. It's actually been more than a month since he's been to mine.

He told me a long time ago that I delved into his private life. I was simply asking too much about his past, where I like to "lay in on the line", so to speak, so he knows my mental health issues and that he may have difficulty with me, at times.

He has probably just wanted more space, as he really does like his own private space. Maybe way more so than any other person I've known, so it is hard for me to grasp. We haven't been together long enough to know if we could live together, and maybe I'm trying his patience, but also trying to see him more often. This way I feel it should be appropriate for me to occasionally just drop by. I feel very seriously for this man.

It is me that needs to back down I suppose, but when I'm here, I cook, do dishes, buy my own food at times, and try to be as quiet as possible. He said last week to leave becasue "I need absolute silence and darkenss".... and I wasn't even doing much but having to cough.

As a long distance relationship it may work, but living together, no. Also he works long hours and I don't work and may not again. I really need more to occupy my time. I also like to leave my home because of how my younger son is treating me. I feel it makes him grow up quicker, he has been so disrespectufl, but this is not about that.

Maybe we've just gotten to the "comfortable" enough point, where arguing happens ..
Thanks everyone.