And I totally agree with this

I don't know how and when the pain will fade, maybe the suffering will be lessened when we open up and let the pain out, but it's not your fault if you can't. You already talking about it, this is what kills the toxic shame, to be let out, because inside us it's like poison. So, let it out and talk hovewer much you need. Or, just scream it out. Or cry it out.
And it's not your fault, just know that.