Quote:
Originally Posted by Purple Heart
For me it is like being forced to sit and watch a horror movie. I can't escape it and have to watch it until the end. I also experience the feelings I felt at that age as the abuse was happening. I'm basically reliving the abuse. The body memories are very strong but the visual is blurry but it doesn't negate the intensity of the experience.
But I believe all this is part of the healing journey. My body wants me to relive the trauma so as to heal. It may sound counter-intuitive but somehow it works for me when dealing with flashbacks.
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Purple Heart, I think there is a kind of duality aspect to flashbacks. If its a one shot deal like movie scene, or a one off, and I pass through the event and then recover, it can be theraputic. I can learn how to deal with the event with less or slightly less impact the next time around. But, if there are multipe triggers one after other I will get overwhelmed. Can't deal with it. Gunshots send me to a dark place that takes me a while to get out of. For me happiness is not a warm gun. My body, mind, and spirit all become discordant and stay that way for a while. Man it is a painful experience. Shalom.