I actually did at one point, think that I was a sociopath.

I was so serious about my theory that I actually read a bunch of books about it, spent time on a couple of forum boards dedicated to sociopaths and psychopaths (yes both are different conditions and I'll get to that in a bit), and even talked to an older woman who is a diagnosed psychopath and told her a bit about myself and asked her if she thought I was a sociopath; that's how serious I was about learning about myself.

Anyways, I don't fit the criteria for neither psychopathy nor sociopathy and the reasoning is simple.

Psychopaths are born as psychopaths. A psychopath has a diminished capacity to feel most emotions. A psychopath cannot feel depression or anxiety at all and isn't influenced by other emotions. A psychopath doesn't feel close to other people and can take or leave friendships and relationships. A psychopath also cannot feel fear and as a result, sometimes engages in dangerous behavior.

I'm not a psychopath for obvious reasons. As a child, I had intense unstable emotions. I was quick to anger, would cry and throw fits a lot, and would lash out at people. As an adult, due to how my mother controlled my entire life and wouldn't allow me to learn how to take care of myself, I have an intense fear of the world which influences many of my decisions. I also often feel depressed, anxious, and sensitive towards rejection and abandonment by other people. A true psychopath cannot feel these things.

A sociopath on the other hand, is made rather than born. A sociopath is developed most commonly by having some intense trauma or neglect before the age of 5 followed by severe abuse and neglect as a child. A sociopath is more impulsive than their psychopath counterparts, seeks thrills and danger, and is incapable of planning ahead. A sociopath is developed simply because they have been through such neglect that they were taught that having connections with people such as love is a weapon to be used against them and as a result, uses people primarily as a self protection mechanism. One also needs a genetic disposition to become a sociopath so not everybody who has gone through such trauma will develop into one.

While I have been through enough childhood trauma to have had the potential to develop into a sociopath, I'm not one simply because I am cautious by nature and I'm not prone to the recklessness, lack of planning ahead, and emotional instability that is required to be a sociopath. I also lack the charm and whit necessary to don the mask of a high functioning sociopath. Furthermore, I do seek limited connections with people even though I'm an introvert who needs a lot of time to myself to recharge. Oh and as mentioned in the psychopathy section of my post, I do feel fear in which a sociopath cannot.

So there you have it. Logic and reason explaining as to why I'm not a psychopath or sociopath so you guys can rest your fears aside