So I've been seeing this new T and I'm getting very uncomfortable with him. I started skipping appointments figuring he would just forget about me and then I wouldn't have to talk about what's bothering me, but he called today to find out why I haven't been coming. I made an excuse, and said I would see him next week.

I have very rigid boundaries about physical touch. I just don't feel safe being touched very much. And this guy is very, very physical. He's taken my hand and held it while I cried, he's rubbed my knees, etc. And I haven't known him for very long. I don't mind getting a hug after a session. And with my other T (I've been seeing her for 5 years), there have been times when she's held me for a minute, or sat close to me, and I was always comfortable. But this T's touch isn't comfortable to me. I am always really, really afraid of saying anything when it comes to physical boundaries. It's a pattern for me. I'm too scared to tell him I don't like it

And I don't know if it's reasonable that I'm uncomfortable, or if it's just because I'm crazy. It might also be just because he's a man. I'm not sure.

Have you ever had to tell a T that the way they touch you (or anything else) violates your boundaries, and you want them to stop? How did it go? How did you get up the nerve?