ty everyone...

i am too afraid to just walk right in and tell him out-right. like i said, it's very, very hard for me to talk about physical boundaries.

i like the suggestion not to use the word boundaries when i tell him. i don't want to say it accusatory, and treat him like he's a predator. i just want to let him know it's not ok with me, and i need a lot more space.

i'm not really sure why i'm seeing him, honestly. i started seeing him because he's also a native american medicine man and i wanted to learn more about my heritage. but it sort of turned into therapy. i already have a therapist that is actually much better at this than he is.

why am i afraid to tell this guy i don't want to be touched? why am i afraid to tell him i don't even think i want therapy with him? something in me is still half-heartedly wanting therapy with him... maybe as a back-up? i don't really understand why.

i am confused. i just know for sure that i don't feel safe when he touches me.