Hello, thank you for the reply. I went to the doctor and she referred me to a psychiatrist, she mentioned the possibility of bipolar disoder too. I'm in the UK so the system we have here (free health care) means I will need to wait a few weeks ( that is with doc putting an urgent request in.)

I'm feeling pretty isolated and scared. I don't feel suicidal anymore but I fear I will as I'm starting to feel worthless and like I don't deserve anythig good.

I'm also wondering if symptoms started a while ago and I should have got help. For around 6 months I kept getting thoughts that I was actually dead. Sometimes I tried to laugh them off sometimes it would cause me to panic. I felt like I was living in the afterlife and all my surroundings had nothino to do with the living world. That I was dead and my family had already burried me. I wish I told the doctor that when I first got those thoughts instead of ignoring it, now I'm terrified I have completely lost it and I'm going insane.