Boy, she is one cool cucumber. And she is driving hard for the most self-serving deal she can get: you home watching the kids, putting your whole week's pay into her domestic budget . . . and her out "having friends." Make no mistake: that will include male friends . . . and you won't be invited to hang out with her and her friends.

She takes conniving to the level of a professional con-artist. She's not cutting you loose via divorce, until she first finds out how much she can milk you for by keeping you around.

I believe her definition of not being in a bubble would mean you question absolutely nothing she does. And she'll do plenty to make you have questions. She's figuring you may be so hang dog desperate to hold on to her that, in exchange for the privilege of living with her, you'll put up with anything. She wouldn't be the first woman to want to see just how thoroughly a man could be made a fool of. Since you want to assume nothing and will only find fault with her, if you get hard evidence of the smoking gun type, she can be in all kinds of compromising situations and just claim it's all innocent.

My thoughts may seem like conjecture. In life, you have to read between the lines . . . or you'll figure out nothing. You're gone for months. You come home, and months later, this woman hasn't wanted any physical connection to you. There's no tears testifying to a truly wounded heart. I'm sorry Dad, but, to my mind, this is not the behavior of a woman in love. Before you take it personally, consider that she may be incapable of truly being in love . . . IDK. Her behavior seems so cold, controlled and calculating.

You seem to need irrefutable evidence of adultery before you'll find real fault with her. That's fine. at some point, though, this relationship can't survive without you being given some evidence that you are loved. You described her as being a "good woman." You need to examine how you conclude the character of another person. Some people do choose to believe the best of others and figure that they will believe a person is good, unless they give hard evidence otherwise. I think that's a silly approach to life. Think back and ask yourself what real evidence your wife has given you as to her character. There must be some. You've known her like 10 years. Let go of wishful thinking, and ask yourself what you actually know - going way back - and what the things you know indicate. Think about her family . . . what they were like and how she fit in with them. What was she brought up to believe. You seem to be rather naiive about people. That can lead to a lot of heart ache. You have to know people for who they really are. That means paying attention and thinking over the implications of what you observe and learn.