Hello Marwa: Since this is your first post here on PC, to PsychCentral! I'm sorry you are in this most difficult situation. As others have mentioned, it's difficult to offer advice since I presume you face some social & cultural pressures we in the U.S. & other western countries would not face. From our perspective, at 36, you would be an adult many times over & it would be expected, in most cases, that you would make your own decisions.

That said... it seems to me, regardless of the social & cultural pressures you may be under, you basically have two choices. One is to defy your family & go with the man you love, if this is even a possibility for you. The other is to abide by your family's wishes & let your love go. Either way this is going to be emotionally traumatizing for you. So if there is a possibility of you seeing some type of counselor or mental health therapist with whom you can talk through what you are feeling, perhaps that might help at least ease the pain if nothing else. Perhaps someone like that might also be in a position to speak with your family on your behalf, or at least help you to figure out if there is a better way to approach this situation. And also please keep posting here on PC. Writing about what you're going through can help too. There can be a lot of support available here on PC. I wish you well...