Hi -- I totally agree with you here: "[regarding] being in the moment but when my issues flair, all the sights I see and sounds I hear are traumatizing and so being in the moment is not good for me." That's why I dislike "meditation." I have my own ways of meditation - playing a musical instrument is one. Listening to my favorite classical music Pandora stations is another. Just listening -- not doing anything else, no background music from that beautiful music. Probably drawing is the best meditationi for me, but I don't do it very often.

CBT works for me, but only up to a point. It does not help me with mood swings, but does help resolve communication issues and some other stuff.

Here's what's been best for me , if you can get it, because unless it's through a clinic, it's very expensive from an independent therapist. I also would like to be in a group, but I don't there are any for this.. What has helped me the most is process, deep Art Therapy by a trained Art Therapist. Jungian dream processing is also very great, and the Art Therapist I had at the clinic I used to go to did that with me, too -- till the -- I don't want to say "powers that be.." it's Destroyers that Be -- decided to get rid of the whole art program.