I am not doing something good right now...I had one terrible day yesterday.i..I took myself down...way down...I saw myself as a failure in life...

so today the wonderful psychiatrist is going to have extra coffee and 5 mg of valium...I shouldn't do it ...but I am going to do it...I have done it...right now I hate this life...I hate what is going on in the world...I have very little hope...