Hello azu-nyan: I'm not sure I understand quite what it is you're asking. So please forgive me if my reply is off-topic. Two thoughts come to mind reading your post. One is that trying to ignore, block or tamp down unwanted thoughts or emotions tends to only cause them to keep coming back stronger & more persistently. In most cases I believe it is better to lean into those sorts of things, breathe into them, & allow them to dissipate at their own pace. This is a Buddhist practice referred to as "compassionate abiding". Here's a link to a mental health oriented description of the practice:

https://mindsetdoc.wordpress.com/201...e-abiding-101/

There can be value in allowing oneself to experience difficult emotions & thoughts if it is done correctly.

The other thing I will mention, though, is that I'm an older person. For quite a few years now I liked to watch such TV programs as "48 Hours" on CBS & the "Dateline Mysteries" on NBC ("Don't watch alone.") But over the past few months or so, I've begun to notice that it's not unusual for me to experience an upswing in paranoid thinking after watching one of these programs. As a result, I've begun to pull back from watching this sort of thing as much.

I've done a little bit of reading with regard to findings coming out of current brain research. And two things stand out for me. One is that much more of who we are, & what we do, is controlled by areas of the brain to which we have no conscious access than we would typically imagine. And the second is that, while consciously we may understand something such as a movie or TV drama is fictional, non-conscious areas of our brains react as if it were real. I think we probably don't appreciate the impact watching frightening TV programs & movies, or playing violent video games has on our brains. So, at least from my perspective, while it makes sense to work constructively with thoughts & feelings we find difficult, intentionally exposing ourselves to disturbing material is, to my way of thinking, just causing us further psychological harm. I wish you well...