People scare me, especially when im supposed to have a personal relationship, like friends rather than colleagues, or when i have to express myself rather than being who they expect me to be, because then i feel like i become real. like they see ME. and its so awful. im not really scared by them but rather by me becoming real. so i go on living isolated from anyone.

i was supposed to ask a colleague to join her in her lunch break jogging, but words dont come out of my mouth. im too scared to just ask.
do you think i should force myself to ask her?
how do you gather the courage to talk?