do these problems sound borderline-ish to you guys, too..?

like... maybe im just trying to put myself together... i've been torn apart for so long in order to handle the pain of all the abuse and neglect that i have had to endure...

like... all these years i've just tried to mask everything by subconciously, automatically, or dissociatively, whatever it could be called.. the hurt... the pain... the neglect.. subcionsciously replacing and covering it up with outside things.. perceived from the world... from others... taking on others traits... who others are... and not fully developing myself because of this... because i was so fragmented... using others to hide myself... saying this person has such and such quality, and it is good. i must be like that... i must be good.
this person has this quality... it is bad... i must not be like that... i cant be bad...
this is good... this is bad... i must be all good... bad is bad...
but the good is not my good... its what is perceived from the outside world as good...

but what about me...?

and now maybe im trying to get rid of all that stuff... i dont want to be like that any more... i want to be some body, a person, 1 person

i dont want to be every body around me, i want to be me...

does that make any sense to you guys?