Quote:
Originally Posted by anais_anais
Those of you for whom treatment brought out dissociated stuff, repressed memories, periods of blackouts- how long did it take for you to feel better? How bad was the period of feeling worse?
Like, I went in for what looked like psychologically manifested physical pain. Out came all this garbage I had no idea I'd hidden and now I have no physical pain but I am instead a barely-functioning, fragmented shadow of a half-person, which is not an improvement, because while I could work through the physical pain, I can't work when... I can't even keep track of when I work. (Related: socially acceptable: "I'm sorry I can't come in this afternoon, I can't shake this migraine," not acceptable: "i'm sorry I didn't come in yesterday afternoon, I thought it was ten years ago")
When does that stop?
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I have no idea when it stops (2 and a half years into current therapy), but for me it's not constant. It's worse, of course, when there are triggers, but there also seem to be periods where I function better and am not getting into trouble with work and life situations (my go-to seems to be things that involve calling the police). I have not gotten much into dealing with memories yet, though, so who knows how it will go. I do know one thing: somewhere around two years into this therapy, a decades long depression started to lessen and now I am without it more than I have it. This is
huge. Nothing--not medication, acupuncture, naturopathy, homeopathy, equine therapy--has worked like this has, and a lot of it is because my therapist works with the dissociation.