Art - if I'm butting in, tell me to go live with una while she's in a non-shower period.

Last week you had that realization with your t, and you've said a couple times on here you're trying to support your husband more and also be a Parent (like with the weed baggie).

I'm not sure I even agree with the basic premise "art needs to change," but, even if you believe you do, it seems like you're trying to do it all at once? To be perfect at it? That's enormous pressure. It would make me angry. Could you maybe ease up on yourself? And if your husband knows about this, not only do I think that he needs to do some changing too - no way is it all on you - but he needs to consider marriage counseling.

Or at the very least a session with a therapist matchmaker.