Hello, I was diagnosed with Bipolar Disorder (II) back in 2002. I was put on Lamictal to control the symptoms. Fast forward to 2009, I lose my job and insurance coverage, and the Lamictal. So I decided to control it myself. The drug of choice was alcohol. So for the last eight years I have drank whiskey nightly to slow things down and let me sleep. But a bad relationship with me wife has not helped and my liquor consumption went up to around a 1.5 liter bottle/week.

My performance at work started dropping after staying up late drinking and arguing, and arguing each day before work. I get my work done, but I am irritable and short. I do not drink before or during work, period. But when I got home, the booze flowed.

I had an annual performance review at work on 3/23. During the review I was told my work was satisfactory and that my team liked me. On 4/22, I had a meeting that I knew would be a problem, and I chose to stay quiet during the meeting. Within 24 hours I was demoted 3 job grade levels, reassigned, and placed on a Performance Improvement Plan (PIP), the legal last step before termination.

I spoke to an attorney who told me to ask for a medical accommodation under the ADA that world rescind the PIP and return me to my position. But my company requires a current diagnosis. I arranged a meeting with a local "behavioral" psychiatrist who seemed to be really upfront and friendly. She put me on depakote and warned me of the side effects. She also told me to stop drinking. Between our meetings (1 week) I had a bad day where I got drunk. I reported it to her.

Her reaction was to tell me to take a note pad and write the following things:
1. I am a fool
2. I am selfish and self absorbed
3. I lack any consideration
4. I have character flaws, probably narcissism
5. I did not take treatment seriou
6. I'm an alcoholic
7. I burn bridges
8. I show no respect and people are tired or my act. And I'm a smart ***.

I was then told she would "fire me" if I did not start attending daily AA meetings and get a sponsor. I went to the meetings and heard many drunkalogues. But the faith based cure and the tenant that free will is shameful does not agree with me. What is wrong with using a prescription with CBT?

Should a psychiatrist really berate and bully the patient. I no longer want to speak with my psychiatrist. I don't really want another hour of insults. Please give your advice.