Quote:
Originally Posted by bluebicycle
OMG. My second therapist did almost exactly what your marriage counselor did! He did the excessive disclosure, teasing, talking about people in his life, etc.. Drove me nuts. He also talked about masturbation once... and that's when I quit seeing him. I did not bring up masturbation or anything that would have led to talking about it. He came up with that topic on his own.
My first therapist, although female like me, did excessive self disclosure too... and it made me become attached to her, as if she were my own mother. She would not (on her own) admit to developing transference, and I don't think she would admit to it even if I confronted her about it. So yep, I totally feel you on that one.
|
Thanks for sharing your experiences--I'm sorry that you dealt with that. MC has never brought up anything sexual, so there's that at least.
The self-disclosure stuff is just what he does as a T--I think he does it with pretty much all his clients. He's said he rejects the idea of the blank-slate T. And that he only discloses with therapeutic purpose (like to relate to something we're talking about), but I feel like some of his stories don't necessarily relate. It's not a case where he seems to be dumping his issues on us--it's really more like he has a need to share the stories with someone, almost, if that makes sense. Sometimes it almost feels like more of a friendship relationship at times--along with the paternal transference. And then it can be confusing when he does put up more of a boundary or doesn't share something major in his life (like the stuff with his wife, which I know I've probably talked to death on this forum).
I think maybe I need to start my own thread on this (I've done one on what it means to work through paternal transference, but this is a bit different, I think). Will do that a bit later...
ETA my individual T, who is a female my mom's age, does very little self-disclosure. I have a bit of maternal transference for her, but I'm much less attached. I felt bad sometimes that I was so attached to MC, but not as much to her. But I think it's due to her tighter boundaries--even though she does allow e-mail and, as of about a year ago, occasional hugs. She's taken steps to keep me from getting too attached (she even admitted a bit of maternal countertransference at one point).