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whisperingskye · May 31, 2017, 05:16 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Fuzzybear

Is it that your mask is too polished..
Or is it that they don't want to help unless forced to by the "system"

Please forgive my cynicism

(From a uk cave

I don't really believe that to be cynicism...more likely that is exactly how it is. I can't blame her fully though, I certainly haven't helped myself by keeping it to myself for as long as I have.

Quote:

Originally Posted by markmcc21

If you're that close you need to get into a hospital. No one wants to hear that suggestion, but now is the time before it's too late. I've been there. I didn't go into hospital and I very nearly ended it in a sure fire way. Your friend would be devastated. You clearly mean something to him. Let him help. Help yourself by letting him help. He has good instincts about how to do it. Let him in. The world would minus a good person without you.

I understand what you are saying, really. The last time I was in the hospital though I came out feeling worse than when I went in. They did nothing the whole time I was there and so I spent my time planning my demise. Clearly it didn't work, but I still haven't moved on from it. And that was the end of October. I swore to myself I'd never go back, because what's the point? It doesn't change anything, it's just a holding pen until they believe the crisis is over.

Quote:

Originally Posted by sophiesmom

I get the pain.

My saving thoughts are always...what if a sliver of joy is just around the corner? If we knew the future, I might say that it's a good answer if you don't like what you see....but we can't see into tomorrow. I hang onto the thought that I may matter today or tomorrow or the next day.
Please....keep your body safe until your spirit comes back.

I struggle with seeing any kind of hope for the future, or any future. I feel like I have already lasted longer than I was meant to. I don't know how to keep pushing forwards waiting for my spirit to return, I feel like that left me long ago and I've just been left with an empty shell.