Hi Apokolips, I don't know if you were directing this post towards me or not. Honestly, I don't know who mentioned that babysitting, or if it was the OP even.

Now, did you read my post about a "possible" post that his wife might present? Now, I don't think she should have stayed at this married man's house, especially not with her children. Yet, the "crime" itself is more than just her catching him cheating online with some woman. The crime was how they were living for a long period of time more like room mates than an actual couple engaged in a relationship. This is a crime "both" of them committed.

Could she be stringing him along? Sure but I don't know that, all I know so far is his side of the story. I also don't know how long she has been lonely either. He got lonely too, and he acted on that when his wife didn't. Well, that opened a door and someone else snuck in and paid attention to her.
Add into that the chemical high that takes place that I posted in that link and that brings on more challenge.

Then something happened to that relationship, something shut it down and she experienced the depressive low, the chemical crash. She invited her husband in that night and he got close enough to sit on her bed, but she was too busy experiencing the chemical crash and distanced.

Then she said something like, "you are wrong for me" to her husband. Then he pushed her for a decision and then still in her chemical crash she said "well get a divorce then". Then as she is slowly recovering she has second thoughts.

I don't think his wife knows what to do, but I do think she doesn't want to be lonely like she was in her marriage to him. I don't think she knows how to talk to him about that. I think she was trying to figure that out when she talked about dating before making a decision. I think for her the question is "taking him back could be going back to being lonely again and that's not what she wants".

They both were bored with the marriage, otherwise he would not have reached out to some other woman for attention, ego boosting, and excitement and stimulation. The crime started before that and both of them share the guilt in that. They are strangers and have been for a while. That's not a relationship, not when a couple are just room mates.

This is a cross road and maybe they don't connect like they should. She seems to be pushing "him" to make the decision and it's in limbo, which is how things were before this blew up the way it did.
I think whatever went south in that other relationship she had burst her ego/self esteem all over again too. She's still in a paradox of confusion (IMO). And I also think she doesn't want to be in a lonely marriage which is what she had, what they both had.