So here I sit and it's 1:00pm. I am still in my nightgown and am nauseated from taking my anti-anxiety drug, Gabapentin. I'm half watching a baseball game.

I am overweight and am doing Optifast. I cheat a LOT. I am in danger of having diabetes. I had a blood test yesterday and am waiting for the results.

I stay on the couch a lot. It is my comfort zone. I don't get dressed unless I am going somewhere.

I have a nice supportive yoga teacher, but I haven't been going. I can walk around the neighborhood, but I don't.

Strangely enough, I am not depressed. I just feel like a loser.

I am so tired of trying. I went to my support group yesterday and it was okay. I just want to lay down.

The good news is my husband is doing better.

Is this going to be the rest of my life? I feel so fragile.