I don't know the difference in age between the two of you, but I definitely understand the situation.

My sister is 3 years older than me. Our mother was emotionally neglectful and abusive since I can remember. Sis moved out at 18, in with a bf. Then, out of state. As far away as possibly while still in the US. She married a man, that everyone could see was not going to work, they divorced, she found someone that she really seems to love and loves her, but I can see a dynamic that I may be the only one that can see it. They married a year and a half ago.

Me, 34 years old, still living with our mother, on disability due to trauma disorders, can't afford to support myself. I feel like my sister abandoned me. We never talked about it. I've had relationships get abusive and didn't leave because I didn't think I deserved any better or that was just what it was supposed to be like.

I wonder, I've seen videos and stories of father daughter date night, in healthy families... could you take her to coffee or a movie? I read, maybe in btwn the lines, that you want to show her what a genuine man does, and how they treat a woman... you can still do that. She may be mad, yes, and she may want to yell at you. If that is the case, sit, let her, and say I'm sorry to her and ask her what she wants for you to make up the pushing away. She needs to see that she can express how she feels without getting hurt. Don't let her become an adult and think that anything is better than being in that house. Show her that men are not all like your father.

I think posting here is a major step! You obviously care about her, and hopefully she can see or understand (one day) that you pushed her away in an attempt to save her from some of that abuse. You weren't abandoning her, in my eyes at least.