Sorry things did not go well last night DadFMF. How about sharing what took place, even though you are feeling defeated right now. When feeling defeated even though you probably tried, while it's hard to talk about it, if you do talk about it, it's an opportunity to "learn". You have shared that you don't know the "language" part and that you tend to communicate more physically. Well, that is what a lot of men actually do where they express themselves in physical ways. And often when a man is angry and frustrated either they take it out physically towards the other person, or they exit and feel confused. What I have noticed about you is that you genuinely don't want to "hurt" anyone, so when you get frustrated you walk away. That's not such a bad thing, you want to care and fix, but you genuinely don't know how.

What I am seeing in your relationship of what you have shared, is that your wife doesn't know "how" either.

Maybe she does have a plan as other posters have suggested. Truth is that it's not unusual for an unhappy person in a relationship to wait things out in a way that sustains them until they find a way to completely walk away.

But, does it really matter? If this is true, so what, because in your situation there are children involved and they need parenting no matter what happens.
Always remember not to see your time with your children as being a babysitter. That can create a resentment that they end up absorbing that is not healthy for them.

In the meantime, what you can still learn is how to develop your ability to better understand the language part so that if this doesn't work out for you and you do end up looking for a healthier relationship, you will have some new skills to work with so you don't end up experiencing this same relationship problem again.