At this point her punishment doesn't fit the crime. And she won't even sit near you?

Her behavior doesn't seem to me from what you are saying that she loves you and wants to get her marriage back. At this point when you are trying to find a way to fix your marriage, the actions you have described is that of a woman who still is angry and want's to vent that anger at you. Unless you initiated this conversation that turned into her reacting so negatively.

It's pointless if this is all you experience when you spend time with her. I can see her needing to finally "vent" things out, but, this is a slow torture and unhealthy.