This truly breaks my heart.

First, I would like to say thank you for being brave enough to post this. It's never easy dealing with any abuse--especially from the people who are supposed to love you and care for you. You are in a community on here where you are free to express yourself without fear of retribution. I'm hoping by you posting this and the reaponses you feel a sense of empowerment and validation in regards to expressing your feelings after recognising them. There's a lot of pain in this post, and unfortunately I relate too well to not only your situation, but how you are coping with it.

Second, one of the first things I would do is establish housing. Living on your own can be very, very scary. I imagine with your anxiety and agoraphobia, it can be tricky to make and maintain healthy platonic relationships. People are hard to trust, but know that that doesn't apply to everyone. You can apply for housing through your city or save your money to move to a better city where there is public transportation and housing. Because you are disabled, you will be at the top of the waiting list for housing.

There are some resources you should check out (will message you them because they won't post. Grr.)

I agree that going to school is a brilliant idea. That's what I did when the abuse at home got so bad. I branched out and made friends who stuck with me at the time. Did they back stab me? Yes. But in the end, I suspect I am much better off than they ever were and ever will be. Try to find like minded people wherever you go. I cannot walk into a grocery store without my boyfriend by my side. It is terrible. But he is like me and we make a great team. College will help you branch out, even if you aren't sure you can do it, try.

In truth, the world is a big and scary place, but you are your worst enemy. The people closest to you often do more harm than good. That's not a good family to have--gaslighting and assault. No. You have recognised that you need help. That is great! Now, commit to going about it. Try to. I'm so sorry all of this has happened to you. It makes me sick and angry, you deserve so much better. Keep your chin up, buttercup and stay strong.