I have tried to tell my friend about my sz, but every time I get close to talking about it, I just end up getting too scared and being really really vague

I haven't dated in a long time,mbut any potential people who want to date me, I usually tell them right away that I have sz because I want to "scare" them away and it usually works

If they stick around then I just keep them as a friend for a little while until they get bored of me