Quote:
Originally Posted by OliverB
I don't have a therapist anymore, he openly said he didn't know what to do with me and if he was causing a negative impact the best I could do is leaving.
I was getting therapy through the public health system.
Therapist from the public health system are not available for more than once a month for 20 minutes unless it is a therapist from a special facility, in my case this therapist, the only one here, is is from the day hospital I was referred after being discharged from IP.
The day hospital is for severe mental illness only, that's why there is this therapist I could see weekly for 45 minutes. There are not other special facility I can be referred to.
So what now? What do I do without a therapist?
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Healing from DID on your own is hard and in some situations down right impossible.
for example one of the first things my treatment provider and I did was my learning grounding, (breathing, stress reduction.....relaxation techniques) and stabilizing my daily life...
though its a positive and first step with any kind of mental health alone or with a treatment provider a special situation happens with DID. with stabilization and grounding techniques comes less dissociation. less dissociation means less alters taking control which means the body born or alter in control is the one handing everything on their own 24 /7. which of course puts the burden of stability and doing everything on their own on the one rather than the team of all the alters doing their job, purpose, reason for being created. Which in some people can cause much stress and internal conflicts and much more.
this doesnt take into account of those with the ability to discover what extreme trauma's caused them to become DID. I was what I consider lucky, because of dissociation all my trauma's were held away from me and I rarely had to deal with them until after integration. Some people learn of their trauma's as they are going through the process of healing. not after no longer having DID. Having to deal with this aspect is very hard on some with DID both physically and mentally.
but on the positive side of learning on your own to stay present in the moment and not utilize your dissociation skills if you can weather the initial storm of doing things all on your own with out the others natural integration happens... this is where the alters realize they / their jobs, purposes, reasons for being created are no longer needed because the one in control is no longer dissociating when triggered (because the one in control is now managing everything on their own). this results in a situation where the alters just merge back together seamlessly and painlessly to form one whole person again (in other words no longer being DID)
that is what happened to me....after I learned how to do everything from my treatment providers like self nurturing, stabilization, grounding techniques so that when triggered I no longer dissociated, my alters naturally integrated with me to become one whole person...
dont get me wrong here, it isnt something that only takes a day or a week, sometimes it can take a very long time in therapy, sometimes even 10-20 years to learn how do all this, doing it on your own could take double that time. I was very glad for the help of my treatment providers along the way.
my suggestion would be to seek out another treatment provider, if for anything else so that you will be established with someone who can help in an emergency situation as you try and do this on your own. let the treatment provider know from the get go that you are going to be doing this on your own but you want the knowing someone is there if needed. kind of like people dont expect to have to call 911 but the service is there if they need it.