Always a doubt lingers somewhere
growing, making me so aware
of my life, feelings lost and alone
amongst crowds, friends, confidence gone...
Dreams vivid and a whirl of action
full of past ghosts, their satisfaction
of letting me crawl, looking behind
Letting them win right now I find.
Do I know me? Sadly not.....
I just sign on the dot.....
not really noticing what I do
just live in a dream, not the kind which come true.
Does anything help? Really not sure...
All therapy does is make me think once more
about all the bad, pain, hurt and fear
makes me wonder why I'm here....
Anxiety holds me back all the time
weakness takes hold, then doubt is all mine....

Jin x