I really hate myself. It's been a while since my self hatred has got this bad but I can't seem to get a handle on it.

I keep doing really ****ing stupid things, and I know I shouldn't do them but I do it anyway. Why can't I just stop myself?

Why do I seem to be doing everything I possibly can to make this worse for myself?

I am a horrible person. A horrible horrible person. I need this to stop.