I still think you need to address your social anxiety issues for your own piece of mind separate and apart from your boyfriend. Whether he is an alcoholic or not...he consumes a lot of alcohol that could be detrimental down the road. Ultimately, he'll have to choose to change. It seems to me that you are putting in a lot of work to keep him on the straight and narrow. Is this something you can do long term? Is it worth it? I like one of the poster's idea of Alanon. That may be very helpful for you. Best wishes.