I'm sorry you're struggling so much.. Maybe you need to allow yourself to grieve the loss of your belongings. That may sound silly, but they were important to you. I find that whenever I can't let something go, grieving is the way forward. It frees me.

Also, I know it can be terribly hard, but try and have mercy on yourself.. You made mistakes as all humans do, the important thing is to learn from them. You'll be better equipped to avoid the same pitfalls from now on.

I can also totally understand the fear of something bad happening again when you've already had that experience. Try to view that fear as a good thing - it's supposed to alert you to danger and protect you from harm. Think about ways to make sure you won't be forced out again. Maybe then you can rest easy knowing you've done everything you can. Of course, sometimes despite our best efforts, things do go wrong - should that happen to you again, know that you've survived each and every one of the worst days of your life thus far - it's likely you'll survive anything life may throw at you in the future

Also, try to trust and remember that something good can happen too Maybe you've had your share of things going wrong. I wish you all the best!