Condolences on the loss of your brother. That was very traumatic for you and has possibly sent you into a depression. That teamed with survivor guilt has done a double whammy on you. If you commit suicide you are throwing a grenade into the lives of everyone who loves you.

Please see a therapist and psychiatrist. There is hope and healing. You posted here so some part of you must want to live. I'm here if you want to talk. I'm thinking and praying for you.