I've been sober a little over a year now. At first I absolutely hated it. Sometimes I still do. But then I think about the downside - puking my guts out, sometimes in bed, going through withdrawals, showing up at the hospital for detox help only to be treated like crap. What's so fun about that.

Being sober is hard - no lying about that, you have to deal with your feelings. And honestly I think my MI has gotten worse since I stopped drinking. Just got fired from my no-brainer minimum wage job for missing too much time due to depression, so I'm applying for disability. I hate the thought of that, but the reality is I can't work right now.

But I know if I'd kept drinking instead of stopping when I did, I'd be dead now. And much as it sucks sometimes, I'd rather be alive.

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