I email my T on average twice per week. On e after each session. This started because I knew progress would be soooo slow if I didn't have this option, and asked her if she would/could in the initial session. She considered it and spoke to her supervisor about it and decided that she could maintain this consistently and so said yes. I text when I email and she used to text back when she had replied to my email, but that stopped fairly recently. It still bothers me that she stopped this without talking to me about it, but hey ho, she is awesome in so many ways I forgive her this.

In addition to this I text or she texts the day before session to co firm the time. I had serious issues entering the gate to her garden before we did this. I would rung the bell and wait, but she never heard it if she wasn't in the therapy shed, which she often wasn't. She used yo say, just ring and come in, and I was like "what is the point of having a bell if I just ring and come in. That isn't how bells work. What if you haven't heard it and I have the wrong time and walk in on you and another client or you and your family. I can't get past the bell, physically, but you don't hear it so I just end up there waiting and waiting."

I was OK waiting, but she kept insisting that I come right in, even though I couldn't physically do it, so she said that we could text to confirm the day before and we have done that nearly every time ever since. It really helps. I now ring the bell and walk straight into the garden, where she is often in the greenhouse or pottering in the garden or coming out from the therapy shed.

I did ask her if I could call if it was ever really bad, but she didn't seem keen on that. I think that she thought I would do it more often. I never have had to, but we did agree that if it was an emergency then I could call, though to be honest, I would probably text and tell her that I needed to talk, and I think she would make time.

For 14 months T has been consistent with this. Nearly always she replies to my emails the same day, often near bedtime, but they nearly always settle me and inspire? me.

The times I have text, for more immediate response, when I font know what to sat or do or when I am in need of prompt reassurance, she does so quickly and well.

I am so grateful for all of this because it really had made such a difference to out therapy. I can express things that I couldn't in person, which has paved the way for face to face discussion. It had allowed me to realise that there is someone out there who cares about me, which has helped me to trust and open up. It has allowed me to feel close enough to her to allow her to access my world, and that is the major point here (Sorry it took a while).

My T has never emailed or text without me doing to first, and I don't think that she ever will, and that is mostly OK for me, but your T doing that shows that she is invested in you. She worried and cared and called to check on you, and I hope that this allows you to see that she is there for you, and that you can talk to her and trust her.

Go with it, it sounds positive to me, despite the hideous struggle that you are going through. A ray of light in a desperate time.