I moved back home after graduating college, and at the time I left college I had already suspected toxicity in my family. However, recently I had a bit of an argument with my Dad that sealed it. My Dad is often grumpy and ornery and sometimes says mean things due to his orneriness. Both of my parents have had a tendency to be quite judgmental towards other people (and me whenever I shared anything with them that they didn't agree with for whatever reasons). I could go into more detail, but I don't want to create a wall of text. In recent times, I have been getting along with them surprisingly well since I've been living my own life more without living in fear of the judgment. This has been going surprisingly well given what I would have expected before.

However, two days after that argument with my Dad, I decided that it's time for me to move on more or less. I'm not necessarily saying I'd like to avoid contact with them entirely, but I feel that I need to move on with my life. These people are just no good, there is really nothing more to say. I feel nothing towards them after the thing that happened the other day, and I feel that when I convinced myself I did..... a good part of it was simply fake.

Sometimes, I trick myself into seeing the situation different. However, please give me encouragement to change this self destructive habit of pretending something is the case that isn't real.... and give me the encouragement I need to move on. Give me the encouragement I need to keep up with my work for the business I have started and leave "family" in the past. It may work for some people, but it hasn't worked for me.

With regard to my mother especially, she may not be through and through a bad person or anything. I frankly don't think she is. My Dad isn't really either. However, these people (particularly my Dad) just aren't really people that are doing me any good in my life at the moment, and I'd like to move on. My Mom is someone I have strong positive feelings for, but at the same time I don't really trust her either. So, I feel that it would be best to move forward and keep my distance from them somewhat as soon as I'm able to. How I would proceed in the later future still depends on and only on what feels right for me.