Having fun can be dangerous. We tend to be atypically depressed. Having fun with friends is like a drug and withdrawal can worsen the depression. I think it also confronts you with the meaninglessness of friendships if the negative consequences are so severe. You might also think the depression isn't real and you're just useless.

So just be prepared for that. You'll soon feel less suicidal.

Friendships are important and meaningful, despite the difficulties when depressed.