So I have had this feeling a few times before, the last time being a couple of days ago. It is more of an intrusive thought, perhaps. I just can't stop thinking about altering my consciousness in some way and getting feelings of euphoria (aka drugs). I think it is driven by feelings of emptiness, being unfulfilled, and maybe also boredom. The strange thing is, it's sort of hard to make these thoughts go away. I tried some exercising and it didn't work... So far, I have come to the conclusion that the way to fix this is to make my mind completely busy with some rewarding task, which is somewhat hard to do when my mind is so preoccupied with drugs.

As mentioned in the title, I have never done hard drugs before, just alcohol and smoking tobacco occasionally. It is strange that I have had the thought of doing hard drugs persist for an entire day multiple times in the past half a year. Does this mean anything or should I just get busier to make this go away? Could it be anxiety or something mood-related?