Hi. I registered a while back, but never posted until now. I really don't know what to say except that, all of the sudden at 37 years old, I have developed some sort of "a - HA" moment where I'm asking myself where I went wrong. I have never been married, the men i have dated, have not worked either because they are abusive, or I'm afraid to commit, and get scared, I have been in and out of the hospital for depression, but that's been a while, I' ve been diagnosed as Bipolar, Borderline, then "undiagnosed", Currently, I am suffering from a little depression, and a lot of fear. Hoping I can open up and get some help and help others. I also got addicted to Vicodin and Norco, went to a rehab last year for 65 days, then to a doctor who charged me $150,000, that I had to take from an inheritance my grandmother's sister left me, leaving me nearly broke. I am disabled and trying to finish my BA in Psychology. I have 3 courses left and an internship. I look around and compare myself to my peers, and today, my dad told me I have nothing to show for my life (of real substance) at 37----he is right, and it makes me sad. I don't know what's wrong. I am a decent person, I love to laugh, but I hold a lot of fear and I sense there is also some thing(s) I will not let go of. I also am chain smoking. It seems I'm getting overwhelmed by it all. I'm hoping to get some real, honest support here.

Thanks for reading if you did.