I try not to compare myself with others because they haven't been in my shoes, either. I have friends that are outgoing, have lots of friends, etc. But they wouldn't have survived 22 years in the military, raised a child on their own, or go through the whirlwind of BPD, bipolar, or PTSD. I'm 51 and have no retirement other than military (which isn't much). I'm living off disability. I've got mental and physical issues, and I would have to train for a whole new job that I may not be able to get because of my age and health. I'm just praying that disability will get me through until retirement age.