vulnerome, I agree with stormy, the answers you are looking for depend quite a bit on what you are looking for in therapy. Why are you there? What do you need help with?

I wonder if your therapist appeared not to want to answer your question about "how therapy works" because she too doesn't know your goals yet. You might tell her that you felt she didn't want to answer your question and explore that. Maybe you can get more clarity.

My current T (my second) likes to call himself a healer, rather than a therapist. That fits with what I am looking for. He says only I know what I need to heal, and we explore that together. I lead where I need to go, and he comes along on my journey. It is so great to have a knowledgable and caring companion who sticks to me like glue as I tramp through the maze of paths in my forest. What has been very healing for me is our relationship.