hi. i am sorry about the pain you're experiencing now.

tranquilizers definitely have an emotions-numbing quality to them. many antidepressants do, too. actually...yeah, the anti-seizure/mood-stabilizing drugs, and lithium, do that, too. maybe its most psych drugs?

my personal advice would be to give yourself space to grieve and go through it, but if you start going downhill too deep, talk to your psychiatrist (or a counselor, therapist, etc...). I'm personally trying to reclaim parts of my inner-life, thoughts+emotions, etc., from the "mental illness" label. Not all sadness is depression, not all nervousness and fear is anxiety, etc. Having said that, I also recognize that some problems require treatment. It is what it is, I guess.

Again, I'm sorry this has happened. I hope things get better in your world.