We all struggle with relationships and sex and all kinds of personal interactions.
People who think they have it figured out often have a rude awakening when things change.

Figuring out things is a life long process. In fact, after many human lifetimes through history we find that though we have come a long way, we have a long way to go in our pursuit of peace and happiness.

Do not be hard on yourself. You are getting better all the time. We must learn from our situations and experience. Other people can tell you why things happened the way they did in a particular incident, but you must come to an understanding yourself.