I am sorry for your pain.

Quite frankly, I am surprised you've been able to make it this far within a very unhealthy family system.

You must love your wife to have endured so much in order to stay with her.

I agree with the couples counseling idea.
You could try it and see if it helps.

Ultimately, you may need to move on in order to have a stable life.
Time will tell.


WC