Hi lowpoint

I'd say that there are going to be lots of grey areas here.........
And part of it depends on what the person has done to trigger those emotions e.g. if someone real close to you has really betrayed you or/and your trust, if someone close has just turned their back on you when you really needed them, if someone you really care about is struggling..........are you going to hurt?? A little?? Very likely!! If you can't just flip a switch in your head e.g. reinterpret the situation or it takes time........is the hurt your fault/your responsibility that you feel that way?? I'd say No!! It's all about being human, it can be unavoidable and very understandable
In fact I'd say that it would be more concerning if you did have a switch you could just flip, just like that, in those situations..............

But I'd also say in some situations there may be different things we can do to try to help manage emotions caused by others, baring in mind these are sometimes much more easy said than done in some situations.............e.g. reinterpreting things, reassessing if things have been directed at you personally or if they are an expression of something else from the person, trying to see things more objectively, looking for a "bigger picture" in the situation, talking to someone else about the situation to get different perspectives, turning your attention in to yourself more and focusing on ensuring your well-being more instead of on them, letting the emotions out as in crying if you feel the need to cry, finding ways to let go of those emotions such as turning anger into something physical or writing it out, having a list of things that may "relieve the pressure" if you're negatively impacted such as "feel good" things or mantra's or breathing exercises..............

Just a few thoughts..........

So, I'd say be careful how much responsibility you put on yourself, but if you can do try to find things to empower you in the situation..........and if you can't.........don't forget we're here for you

Alison